The Bachelor: I Believe Grant Ellis Wasn't Given A Fair Shot As The Lead (He Was Trying To Be "Responsible")

The Bachelor season 29's Grant Ellis wasn't given a fair shot as the show's leading man, and I believe that it was due to the incredible amount of responsibility that he felt not only during his overnight Fantasy Suite dates, but as the second Black Bachelor. Grant, a now-31-year-old day trader from Newark, New Jersey, got his Bachelor Nation start in Jenn Tran's Bachelorette season. He began his Bachelor journey with 25 women, and he's now narrowed them down to just three--Juliana Pasquarosa, Litia Garr, and Zoe McGrady.

Throughout The Bachelor season 29, I've watched Grant struggle in the role. He doesn't seem to understand why the women get upset with him when he does things such as allowing the other contestants to steal him away for long periods of time on group dates and participating in public displays of affection in front of the other women. At first, I thought that Grant was doing a terrible job as the Bachelor, but then I realized that he never really had a fair chance on the show because his sense of responsibility was hanging over him like a dark cloud.

Grant Was Celibate For A Year Before His Overnight Fantasy Suite Dates

Grant Wanted To Handle The Fantasy Suites With Care

Ahead of Grant's overnight Fantasy Suite dates episode, he appeared on the March 6 episode of The Viall Files podcast, hosted by former Bachelor Nick Viall and his wife, Natalie Joy. Grant admitted that Fantasy Suites are "tricky," but he thinks that he "handled [him]self very well."He also revealed that he'd been celibate for a year before The Bachelor, due to being hurt in a past relationship, which had lasted for seven years.

Still, Grant didn't shy away from kissing during his season, and he owned up to the fact that he kissed many women during the show. However, he shared that, during the Fantasy Suites, he "really reserved" himself because "when you get physical intimacy involved, it changes things."

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Grant added that there could be red flags in a relationship, but after being intimate with a person, "everything's wonderful." Because of this, Grant really "tried to be responsible" in his final days on the show. He said that he didn't go into the Fantasy Suites saying that he wasn't going to be intimate, "but I had to know that this person was my person in order for me to engage. And at that point, I didn't know who."

When Natalie asked Grant if that meant that he hadn't been intimate with any of the women, he responded, "I didn’t say that directly. I didn’t say I didn't do other things, but I handled myself well, you know." Because Grant felt such a strong sense of responsibility during his Fantasy Suite dates, it's possible that he didn't give himself a fair chance to get closer with the women because he was following his head more than his heart.

Grant Felt A Responsibility As The Second Black Bachelor

Grant Knew That People Might Judge Him

Grant also shared that, because he was only the second Black man ever to star in The Bachelor after Matt James' groundbreaking season, he felt so much pressure. He shared,"there's also an extra added pressure on being the second Black Bachelor ever. You think that you have to make a decision based off of what people would want, or this or that, but you have to go with your heart. And I think I did that."

Grant shared that he worried that people would judge him about the Fantasy Suites, stating that there was the "pressure and the stereotype" because he was the second Black Bachelor. He shared that he worred that, "People are going to think I'm a player or this or that."

Grant said that he went into the Fantasy Suites with "real intentions," and, before that, he was celibate for a year because he was hurting after getting out of a seven-year relationship. Grant added that physical intimacy is "great," but he wanted to make sure that it was with someone who was his "person," and then they could be intimate "all the time."

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In an interview with Us Weekly, Grant also spoke about how he felt a strong sense of responsibility to represent Black men in a positive light. He said, "To me, being the second Black Bachelor means giving a voice to people that might not typically watch this franchise. They might see me and resonate with the way I speak or some little things that I say."

Grant added, "Sometimes in culture, it’s not looked at as cool to be really smart. I want people to see that and be like, 'OK, you could be a Black man and you can take your education seriously.' I just want to be a role model. What excites me is people seeing my story — my life struggle, everything I’ve been through that led me to be the man that I am."

Grant also expressed that he wanted to be an example for others to follow. He said, "What excites me is people seeing my story — my life struggle, everything I’ve been through that led me to be the man that I am. I lived in Newark, N.J., which is a really tough neighborhood. I think that with the right discipline, the right family, you could grow up and be somebody who’s articulate, educated, and you could really make strides."

Given the Bachelor franchise's problematic history when it comes to racial issues, it's no wonder that Grant felt such a strong responsibility to represent himself well as a Black man. He wanted to use his story to prove that a man with his background could be successful, and I think he's done a wonderful job. Grant has put a lot of pressure on himself, and he should be commended for how he's handled himself on The Bachelor so far. However, I believe that it's a burden that he never should've had to carry. Based on the show's controversial history, I don't trust that the producers will protect Grant.

All Of This Pressure Was Unfair To Grant

Grant Had A Challenging Bachelor Journey

Grant Ellis in a confessional on The Bachelor — Grant Ellis on The Bachelor

While all Bachelors feel the pressure of the Fantasy Suites, Grant had the added pressure of being the second Black Bachelor and possibly being judged because of it. He wanted to represent himself in a positive light, so that others could follow his example. However, all of this pressure was unfair to him, and his journey was more challenging because of it. I think that the lack of representation in the Bachelor franchise is problematic because, when the show does decide to cast a person of color, they feel so much responsibility that they can't fully enjoy their journey.

I also think that Grant put a lot of pressure on his overnight Fantasy Suite dates, but it's refreshing to hear that he put so much thought into them after other Bachelors' mistakes. The Bachelor season 26 star Clayton Echard and The Bachelor season 27's Zach Shallcross both broke the trust of some of their contestants when they admitted that they'd been intimate with them in the Fantasy Suites on national TV. The details of the overnight dates used to be left to the imagination, but these men broke that tradition, and, in the process, greatly hurt the women.

Grant felt a sense of responsibility to make better choices, but this might've caused him not to behave the way that he normally would've if he knew that he was falling in love with someone. I believe that The Bachelor shouldn't have three Fantasy Suite dates because it's too confusing for the lead and the women. Hopefully, Grant's choices won't be detrimental to his journey, and he'll make the right decisions as he moves forward with his Bachelor journey. However, it almost seems as though Grant was trying to make up for past Bachelors' mistakes, and he put way too much pressure on himself in the process.

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I feel that Grant didn't have a fair chance during his Bachelor season because he felt such a strong sense of responsibility during his overnight Fantasy Suite dates and also as only the second Black Bachelor lead in franchise history. I really hope that Grant gained the clarity that he needed so that he doesn't have to be alone anymore, as he's said so many times on the show. Hopefully, Grant's Fantasy Suites led to him finding the love of his life.

The Bachelor airs Mondays at 8 p.m. EDT on ABC.

Sources: The Viall Files/YouTube, Us Weekly